Raymond Paul Bessette Jr.

Raymond Paul Bessette Jr., 64, of Missoula, passed away Sunday, Aug. 3, 2014, at St. Patrick Hospital from complications of frontal temporal lobe dementia.

Ray was born Oct. 20, 1949, in Anaconda to Virginia (Morse) and Raymond Paul Bessette Sr. As a young boy, his relatives nicknamed him "Buddy," which he proved to be to the very end. The family moved several times, with Ray attending 13 different elementary schools. In 1962, their final move was to Missoula. He graduated from Loyola High School in 1968, where he played football and was the basketball manager for the Loyola Rams.

In 1966, the family moved to the Northside and his life was forever changed. When you are a Northsider, you are a member of all families that become one. When Ray met Barb Neilson, she kept telling Ray that she had an older sister, Carol.

On Oct. 26, 1968, Ray married Carol Neilson at St. Francis Xavier Church. Ray worked for the Missoulian, Missoula Electric Cooperative, Thompson Dental, American Dental, Hu-Friedy Dental and PDT. In 1991, his job took him and Carol to Illinois to work for Hu-Friedy Dental. After four years of missing family, friends and the mountains, Carol and Ray moved back to Missoula in 1995. They vowed to never live anywhere else again.

Ray played slow-pitch softball (but not for very long), fast pitch, basketball for Shaffer's Market and golfed. Ray fished and hunted with his father-in-law and brother-in-law, Bob and Wayne Neilson, in his early married years. Ray went on many memorable hunting trips with his brother Greg, Leonard Sharbono, Jerry Schrieber, Bruce Sperry and others such as Jim Vandehey.

He coached son Brian all through Little League. Ray and Carol faithfully watched Shelly and Brian bowl in league every Saturday morning, even with the occasional hangover. Through all of Shelly's and Brian's sports, Ray never missed an out-of-town game or tournament. In 2000, Brian became head coach for Sentinel softball varsity girls with Ray as assistant coach and Carol was scorekeeper. While coaching, a lot of great memories and new friends were made and always talked about. Ray also coached granddaughter Kailey for two years in Little League. He loved the Griz and the St. Louis Rams.

His family meant everything to him. He was so proud of Shelly and Brian in everything they did and became. We didn't think that could be topped until the granddaughters came along; Kailey, Karley and McKenna. He was the best Papa ever. Special nephews Kevin and Steve Peterson were like sons to him. Brother Greg was always helping out Carol and Ray with something: back to the days of cutting trees to burn wood, to the present. Nephews Kevin Peterson and Zach Bessette were always ready to help whenever needed. Brothers Mike and George were so loving and caring on Ray's last day with us. Mike spent the night at the hospital singing to Ray and keeping him comfortable. Mike and George shaved him, hugged him and comforted him. John Neilson was a constant for Ray and Carol throughout his battle with his disease, especially for the two-month stay in the hospital. Son-in-law Will Stebbins has helped the family with so many things and always found time no matter what was needed. Daughter-in-law Tamara was so appreciated as Ray's pants always needed to be hemmed.

Ray will always be remembered as kind, devoted, life of any party, loving father, brother, son, uncle, friend and husband. We love you, Ray!

Survivors include his mother Virginia; wife Carol; daughter Michele Rae Van De Hey (Will Stebbins); son Brian Robert Bessette (Tamara); sister Paulette Lewis; brothers Mike (Sherry) of Kalispell, Fred (Angie) of Helmville, Greg (Marie), George (Curtis), Tim, Matt and Chris (Robin) of Stevensville; sister-in-law Devie; mother-in-law Lois Lehl; brother-in-law Wayne Neilson (Cindy) of Tucson, Arizona; sisters-in-law Janice Peterson (Paul Brady) and Barb Neilson-Smart (Jack) of Bullhead City, Arizona; granddaughters Kailey Rae and Karley Brian, McKenna Rae; step-granddaughters Ivy Audrain and Tiffany Stebbins and step-grandsons Don and Brandon Stebbins, and Luke Audrain; step-great-grandsons Caleb and Dale and step-great-granddaughters Karmyn and Isabella "Izzy"; aunts and uncles and many cousins, nephews and nieces.

Preceding him in death were his father Raymond, brother Johnny B., father-in-law Bob Neilson, step father-in-law Pete Lehl, uncle Bill Neilson and several aunts and uncles.

Funeral services will be at 2 p.m. Friday, Aug. 15, with reception following at the Christian Life Center, 3801 Russell St.

Honorary pallbearers are Northside families Neilsons, Meuchels, Shaffers, Richters, Jaspersons, Schatzes, Mike Hamlin, John Pearson. Rich McDonald, Garlands, Saylers, Loewens, Walter Durrant, Batts and Val Smith.

Ray would welcome casual dress
Read Raymond Bessette Jr's Obituary and Guestbook on www.missoulafuneralhomes.com.