Caleb Boelman

Caleb Bruce Boelman, 32, passed away at his home in Butte, late Saturday night, August 10, 2024. He left behind an ocean of loved ones—his husband—Doug Ingraham and the two boys they fostered, his parents—Tom and Meg, four siblings—John, Jacob, Hannah, and Esther, “adopted brother” (AKA Best Friend) Cooper Meyers, a grandmother—Shirley Boelman, two aunts—Cindy Biggerstaff and Judy Boelman, his uncle Gordy Boelman, Doug’s parent’s—Bruce and Cindy Ingraham, Doug’s brother and sister-in-law Marc & Ashley, his niece and nephew—Milee and Jax Ingraham, as well as his chosen nephews Triston, Justin and Austen, multiple cousins, friends he had from childhood, friends he made as an adult, and life long friends he made just the week before. That was Caleb.

During his time in Butte, Caleb cultivated a variety of relationships and grew his chosen family. Douglas, Schylar Baber, Ezerae Coates, Ashley Tracy, Anthony Hughes, Brian Flikkema, all the Belisario’s and so very many more enjoyed his light. He brightened the world at Taco Del Sol, Pita Pit, and his outreach work with the Butte-Silver Bow Health Department. In Missoula he went to school at the University of Montana, worked at Bernice’s Bakery, became the president of LAMDA, worked with developmentally disabled adults through ORI, and supported the LGTBQ+ Community Center.

During a short stint in Washington DC, Caleb built a family with Freddy’s (which was always a source for good memories and fun stories) and worked at Founding Farmers Fishers and Bakers. He loved the exposure to the art, culture, and politics of Washington which carried over to a love for travel, but he couldn’t stay away from home for long.

Caleb truly bloomed when he returned to Montana and for the next six years he became very familiar with the road between Butte and Missoula. He returned to the U of M and in 2022 became an assistant events manager at the Montana Museum of Art and Culture after working as a facilities assistant for the Missoula Children’s Theatre, an organization he had been part of for over 10 years. He planned to graduate in May of 2025 with a BA in Theatre and a focus in Arts Management. In Butte Caleb was beginning to build a relationship with the Orphan Girl Theatre, volunteered through the local Kiwanis Club, and assisted Ingraham Environmental as need arose. Meanwhile, Doug and Caleb grew and found a peace in each other that was calming and invigorating at the same time. They married on New Year’s Eve 2023. 

Though Caleb always considered Missoula his home, his travels to Butte and the home he built with Doug over a 10 years period became a sanctuary. He loved painting the mountains out the window from the apartment while the dogs and the cats played around the house. Before having to take more time with Doug‘s health, Doug and Caleb were foster parents to two amazing young boys. If Caleb treated his cocker spaniels, golden retrievers and kittens like children, you can only imagine how close he held those two boys in his heart. 

Caleb‘s last weeks were spent doing exactly what he loved—serving as a camp counselor for MCT’s Performing Arts Camp up at Flathead Lake. He could not have been prouder of the children, the other camp counselors (many of whom had been campers at previous camps), and the program itself. His growing wish was to bring that same energy to Butte and make a production of his own while helping the OGT.

Caleb and Doug did not have nearly enough time with their Butte, Missoula, and Miles City families or to enjoy their pets, video games, trips to Disney, Broadway, Chicago, or any of the hundreds of other adventures they dreamed of taking. Yet always, in the adventures they have had sharing the good times with people made them better. Regardless of how short their marriage was, Doug and Caleb found a strength in each other and their families that was unrivaled. 

A Celebration of Life service will be held at the University of Montana in the Montana Theatre at 2:00 PM on Sunday, August 25, 2024. In lieu of flowers the family requests you donate to The Orphan Girl Theatre in Butte or a PAC scholarship fund in Caleb’s name at Missoula Children’s Theatre.

Doug would like to share a special thank you for the Belisario‘s, for their lifelong friendship, and for their comfort on the night of Caleb’s passing. The Ingraham and Boelman families would also like to thank our communities and Caleb’s friends for their incredible outpouring of love and support.